What to Say to a Man During Sex
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27 Phrases Men Love to Hear In Bed
Guys open up about the hottest things you can possibly say.
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Guys open up about the hottest things you can possibly say.
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Sometimes the sex is so good that you want to go back-to-back, and your man certainly won't mind. "When your lady wants round two, you give her what she wants — and you give it to her good," says Brian, 36. "Nothing makes me feel better than making her orgasm, especially when it's more than once."
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Getting a nice slap across the butt during sex might sound kinda kinky, but you'll end up enjoying it just as much as he does. "Whenever my girlfriend and I are going at it doggy-style, she always asks me to give her a couple spanks. There's nothing sexier," says Luke, 25.
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Guys love the freedom to take charge — and the surprise-factor can be a major turn-on for you, too. "I love when my wife gives me complete control; it gets me so horny," says Mark, 32. "We almost always end up against the wall or on a table — and she's never disappointed with that."
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After years together, you and he are familiar with each other's anatomy, but a little verbal reminder of what pushes you over the edge is helpful from time.
"Exploring new touches and sensations can make sex seem like an exciting discovery the two of you are making together," says Vanessa Marin, a San Francisco-based sex and relationship therapist, of why Kevin, 38, loves hearing these words.
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"My fiancée doesn't normally swear, but when she lets go in bed, it's such a turn-on," says Luke, 32. Shy? Dirty talk doesn't need to be dirty. Simply narrating the action by noting where his hand — or something else — is and how good it feels is plenty, explains Emily Morse, a sex expert and host of the podcast Sex With Emily . "This helps keeps you both in the moment."
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"Being able to actually see each other, instead of fumbling around in the dark, is awesome," says Avery, 33. Self-conscious? Focus on how things feel—or how his eyes light up as you show everything off.
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"Whenever my girlfriend says this, I know whatever's coming next is going to be interesting, to say the least," says Aaron, 28. If you have a fantasy you've always wanted to try, setting it up as a dream can help minimize any shyness about discussing it, says Morse. Fantasies don't need to be turned into reality to be hugely hot, and getting used to talking about what gets you off — even if it's never going to happen in real life, such as you and he stranded on a desert island — can do wonders for your sex life.
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"We have a toddler, so we're always interrupted when we try to get busy," says Derek, 29. "Having sex on the table as a potential option during the night, even if we don't actually do it, reminds us that our sex life is important." Setting an early alarm for a sex date can also work, especially if you and he are both beat or likely to be disrupted when you head to bed.
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"I love when my wife wants to give me a blow job," says Jeff, 41. "She knows I love them, but I never want her to do them just for me. When she says she wants to, it makes me feel like I can really let go." Focusing on how happy your guy gets makes a blow job feel less like, well, a job, and can also enhance your pleasure. "Conveying enthusiasm is a huge turn-on, and the more turned on he gets, the more confident and masterful you'll feel," say Mark Michaels and Patricia Knight, sex educators and authors of Partners in Passion.
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"My fiancée is the boss-lady at work, so knowing that she's in this powerful position and she lets her mind wander back to me is a huge compliment," says Don, 40. A few dirty daydreams can absolutely make your workday more exciting — and letting your guy in on them will seriously get him going. Thinking about how it feels when he kisses you or slips his fingers underneath your bra strap can help switch your brain from feeling exhausted to feeling excited.
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"I know this could sound gross, but hear me out," says Andy, 32. "When my wife says she likes the way I smell, even when I'm drenched in sweat, I feel really manly. I also feel like it's hot — scent is so intimate, especially when you're naked." Sex is all about senses, and letting your husband know the ways he gets you going will help put you both in the mood. He also may not realize how much his scent turns you on, and clueing him in is a good reminder of the animal magnetism you have for each other, says Morse.
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"My wife doesn't make a lot of noise in bed, so it's sometimes still hard for me to tell whether or not she's climaxed," says Miguel, 29. If he just rocked your world, only good can come from letting him know!
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"My girlfriend says this when she's on top of me," explains Chris, 27. "The combination of dirty and sweet is irresistible. I feel the same way — I love being so incredibly close to her." A major benefit of being married or in a long-term relationship is being able to say whatever—from the sappy to the XXX — in bed. So spill already!
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"No matter how many times I hear this, it never gets old," says Destiny, 34. This reminds me of how much I like to hear that I have great boobs. It never gets old to hear. Why? Because it brings certainty into the bedroom. Now, in this case, your guy knows what you think of him. You can't read each other's minds, so take the guesswork out of the equation, and give his penis some praise.
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"Sometimes coming feels like a selfish act, and saying 'I want you to come' makes it feel not only invited, but celebrated," says Aaron, 35. Eagerness and passion can set your beau over the edge in a heartbeat. Creating a safe space for intimacy during the dirty stuff by saying youwant his stuff shows that you really love all the things during sex, and that you aren't just doing it because you feel like you have to.
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"Name calling can be fun, especially during role play," says Peter, 35. Spoiler alert: Some men like to be called names during sex, so get Ms. Nasty on his ass. Loosen your hair, shake out the hairpins, and give your guy the verbal ride he's been dying for. If you're new to the name-calling game, remember that it's more about trust and intimacy than the actual name-calling. You're building a world meant only for the two of you.
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Neil said he likes "demands for" his man parts, too. And this may sound like a no-brainer to some, but it's easy to forget that men crave compliments. So if dirty verbal-play in the boudoir is not your strongest asset, just remember: Go straight for the penis. No need to improvise a sonnet worthy of Shakespeare; a nice I love your dick, sprinkled in during foreplay will suffice.
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"If [ladies] try to talk to me while I'm in their mouth, that drives me crazy in a good way," says Matt, 34. So, to that end, if you thought your confidence threw your man over the edge (which it does), add some animated excitement withcertain body parts in your mouth — to the mix and watch his, ahem, head explode. Don't worry, you don't have to be able to speak in full sentences while performing this act. Hearing how excited you are is all he needs.
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David, 38, says that "when a girl is screaming it during sex, it's pretty hot." So: screaming this gem at the top of your lungs can get a man excited pretty quickly. These three words have it all: assurance, determination,and, last but not least, sex appeal. Feeling wanted by your partner, pardon my French, is sexy as fuck.
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Bradley, 32, prefers this gem of a phrase as opposed to "want me to suck your dick?" Why? "I like it because then it seems like her incentive, she's into it, and not just doing it for me." To that end, be direct and confident. Want to give him head? Tell him you are going to to do so. Enjoy the act? Tell him you love it. It won't be just his confidence growing bigger...
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"French or Spanish or anything but English," turns Matthew, 27, on. So, if you're bilingual, pepper in some steamy phrases during coitus to make your lover's toes curl. Don't be afraid to throw in some non-sexy phrases to test your man's vocabulary, because, hey, it's never a bad time to learn a new language.
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The guy who digs this phrase, James, also says he likes when ladies whisper what theywant him to do to them. It makes sense: whispering automatically brings you closer to your partner. It's a conversation only meant for his ears.
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"I actually find it sexiest when it's just moans from each partner, with a tasteful 'I'm about to come' tossed in at the end," says John, 35. Not the talkative type in bed? That's OK. Not all men like or need talking. If you feel shy during sex, remember: 1) Do what makes you feel comfortable, and 2) your man should be happy knowing and hearing you are feeling pleasured, no matter what sounds you're making.
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"I like it when she says it during – meaning physically — and after – meaning emotionally," says Lance, 46. Whisper it in his ear during the act, send a text while he's at work, or even tell him that during a laughing fit watching Netflix. Any time is the right time to communicate your appreciation for your unique connection.
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"I like being told what to do because I can't really get off unless I know the other person is enjoying it too," explains David, 28. So be direct about your erotic needs, and then let your man get off while he getsyou off.
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No, not Facebook status updates, but more like how the whole thing's going. That's what Dennis, 35, likes. It'll pay off for you, too: Let your partner learn and experience what kinda works, what doesn't work, and what really really works keeps the sex fun and enticing — and more pleasurable. Besides, no matter how long you have been with your guy, reassurance during sex goes a long way for everyone involved.
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"Her aggressively raising the stakes on me to perform and not 'lose the handle' on what I was doing made me really want to give her what she wanted," explains, David, 31. So: Never forget your partner (hopefully) loves to pleasure you, so let him know what you want more of before he finishes. After all, don't you wanna finish, too?
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What to Say to a Man During Sex
Source: https://www.redbookmag.com/love-sex/sex/advice/g768/turn-ons-for-guys/